Author Archive

Movie Review: Inception

After The Matrix came out, every movie-going mouth-breather nationwide suddenly began waxing philosophical like coffeehouse hipsters. You may remember it sounding something like this, “So if reality is just a perception, and technology was advanced enough, how would you be able to tell if your life wasn’t just a super realistic videogame you’re plugged up to?”

Minds. Were. Blown.

Meanwhile, those of us who had actually read a book in our lives, or played enough videogames to already appreciate this sort of 21st century zen koan prior to the film… we still thought it was a hell of an action movie with a surprisingly intelligent sci-fi storyline.

The film was a box office hit and a cultural landmark. Matrix posters becoming as common a sight as MC Escher and Salvador Dali on co-ed walls.

For the purposes of this review, and to forgive great directors their latter day sins, we’ll refrain from discussing the sequels.

Fast-forward roughly 10 years and Christopher Nolan – Mr. Dark Knight himself – goes and does the impossible. He out-Matrix’s the Matrix. How?

He writes and directs Inception, a film where he essentially puts the Matrix…get this…IN THE MATRIX.

(continue reading…)


Top 10: Visually Stunning Rap Videos

Rappers. What they lack in actual musicianship, they more than make up for in over-the-top music videos. I mean, you kind of HAVE to think of something insanely interesting for these people to do on camera when their only musical performance skill is holding a microphone and speaking into it.

And that’s just not going to fly on MTV VH1 FUSE Palladia (there we go, someone DOES still play music videos!). Here’s an homage to some of my all-time favorite rap music videos, as decided upon by their visual “stunningness” and placed in no particular order.

(continue reading…)


Album Review: Pete Yorn – Back and Forth

When I was little, I was a Dimetapp junkie. At the slightest sign of sickness, I’d demand a generous spoonful of that sweet grape syrup, and even if I wasn’t sick, I’d play ill just to get a fix.

Fast-forward 15 years and I’m a writer who has called Dashboard Confessional “Robitussin for the broken heart” – a surefire remedy for what ails you but which, when unneeded, is practically unpalatable.

Well, if Dashboard is the ‘Tussin, Pete Yorn’s Back & Forth is Dimetapp, because I’ll be damned if Mr. Yorn hasn’t turned me into a 24-year-old drugstore cowboy jonesing for sugary nepenthe for the broken-hearted, despite the fact that I have absolutely no legitimate need for it.

Yorn wears his lyrical heart on his sleeve without coming off as trite, and he bears his musical soul without being over-the-top or melodramatic. If the album were to be boiled down to two adjectives, I would say: “honest” and “subdued.” It’s honest without being brutal, and subdued without being boring.

Like chugging on Dimetapp when you’re not really sick, listening to Yorn’s new album when you’re not presently heartbroken isn’t exactly something to brag about – but it’s also far from unenjoyable.

Bottoms up.


Album Review: mewithoutYou – It’s All Crazy! It’s All False! It’s All A Dream! It’s Alright

Having not drunk the proverbial Kool-Aid of indie/experimental rock that would magically allow me to totally forgive a band its blatant musical sins in exchange for its obvious artistic creativity, I find myself deeply conflicted when it comes to mewithoutYou in general, and their new album It’s All Crazy! It’s All False! It’s All A Dream! It’s Alright specifically. So, at risk of being crucified by devout fans, I will speak my piece to the masses and promptly make my exodus.

I like mewithoutYou, and if I could get over the disturbing fact that mewithoutYou’s singer, Aaron Weiss, tends to sound like a creepy cross between a folksy Sesame Street character and Heath Ledger’s Joker, I just might love the band. I will say, their new album contains much less screaming, ranting, and violent instrumentation – traded in for a playful, Nickolodeon-ready vibe and childish singing inflection – so it sounds much less like the schizophrenic rock ramblings of a religious nutcase and more like the subdued soundtrack to a Sunday school puppet show…put on by a religious nutcase.

It’s really too bad I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place – the rock being the sense that I’m listening to a band that jacks off to Raffi tapes (“A Stick, A Carrot & String”) and the hard place being the growing fear that their lead singer belongs to a cult and I’m being subliminally recruited (“Bullet To Binary (Pt. Two)”).

Bottom line, if you’d like to see the wolf in sheep’s clothing, this one’s for you.


This Is Sincerity

No funny links. No smartass one-liners. Not this post.

This is for anyone who really loves Athens.

This morning, I got a call from one of my best friends, informing me there was a fire downtown and that he needed my help taking photos for his magazine and blog. And so, from 9 a.m. until 11 a.m., I watched through the lens of my camera as the famous Georgia Theatre burned away to nothing but its exterior walls.

If the gravity of this situation doesn’t hit home with you already, go ahead and stop reading.

For avid Athenian concert-goers, there’s an acute selfishness to the pain of losing the Theatre right before AthFest, but there’s also a greater, more generalized pain shared by all Athenians. It’s the shocking slap to the face that comes with losing a beloved, iconic landmark.

We never tend to think of buildings as living things that can die – in fact, we tend to assume they’re immortal and will always be around. And sure, there are plenty of buildings that are never “alive” in the first place. Nobody’s going to cry if a McDonalds burns down, but that’s because a place like that has no soul – no history.

The Theatre had history, and the people who passed through its doors had their own history and relationship with it, and that’s why the Theatre was alive.

Every memory I have of the Theatre – of guitar teching, attending shows, hanging out backstage – it’s all tempered by the reality that those are the last memories I get to have of the place.

It’s pretty rare I get sentimental over something. I’m an incredibly vulgar person and, if that wasn’t enough, being a journalist/writer affords you a unique ability to distance yourself from tragedy – you see it as a story to be captured and told; not something you’re even remotely a part of. But while watching the Athens Fire Department do their best to put out the flames, I couldn’t help but feel like I was watching helplessly as a friend painfully deteriorated on his deathbed. And I found myself starting to choke up.

It was about that time I ran into Will Greene, the Theatre’s owner.

Will was standing a block from the Theatre, surrounded by friends, but clearly alone in his own world. Having poured ungodly amounts of his own sweat, money, and love into the venue, I wouldn’t dare to begin to imagine how he was feeling. What I did know is that he wasn’t crying. And if he, of all people, could maintain composure and hope that, no matter what the outcome of the fire, the Georgia Theatre would be rebuilt, then so could I.

I’m certainly not religious, but losing someone (or some living thing) important to you will tend to make you yearn for an afterlife. So in the wake of this morning’s destruction, as sad and shocking as it was, I’m grateful for the silver lining of having little reason to doubt, and every reason to hope, the “Georgia Theatre” will rise from the ashes and be reborn under a new roof.

And I truly believe if anybody has the heart and determination to do it, it’s Will Greene. The slogan around the Theatre was “Make Mama Proud,” but I think it’s safe to say Will now has all of Athens ready and waiting to be proud of him.


We’re Onto You: Indie Is The New Punk

In the genesis of any truly unique genre of music, there is a clearly defined sound and a clearly defined mentality or set of values that exists within the typical fan of said sound. As time goes on, that sound and mentality may increase in popularity, inspiring sub-genres, spin-offs, and the ever-despised fakers.

Whatever the case, as time goes on and as a given musical genre grows and evolves, it becomes less and less the clearly defined seed of creativity it once was and more a mere root of inspiration that runs through the various offshoots.

It is for this reason that “indie” is the new “punk.”

In its early years, “punk” had definition, both as a unique sonic experience and as a rebellious, middle-finger mentality toward the establishment. Fast-forward a decade or two and things get mighty blurry. Nowadays, everything can be a little “punk” if it wants to be.

Modern mainstream “punk” isn’t dangerous or sincere – it’s trendy and purchasable. True punk never cared to be mainstream, and that’s exactly why it blew up – there’s nothing cooler than someone who does their own thing and couldn’t give a shit less what you think of them.

Enter indie rock. Similar to early punk, early indie rock had a fairly uniform and recognizable sound and attitude. They weren’t in it for the fame and money. They shied away from major labels, or were simply ignored by them, and they didn’t dress to impress. They put out their albums on vinyl – before it was cool again – for crying out loud.

Enter the digital revolution. Pro Tools, home recording rigs, MySpace, Facebook, P2P filesharing services, torrents. Suddenly the means of self-production, distribution, and promotion are cheaper and more accessible. Suddenly major label support is harder to justify. Suddenly, every band wants to be independent.

And so, as with punk, at one time “indie” rock identified a particular sound, but now, because so many artists have latched onto the indie attitude of DIY, we have artists from all genres going “indie.”

A great example of this is Radiohead. Yes, that Radiohead – a band that could sell out Madison Square Garden every night of every day of every year, forever. Clearly not a bottom feeder, Yorke and company are “indie” nonetheless per the fact that they have no major label backing. They do it all on their own. They may not sound indie, but they operate indie.

Then there’s “indie music,” which is where the watered down nature of the term becomes most evident. Let’s see… there are indie bands that don’t play indie music (Minor Threat or Reel Big Fish), bands that play indie music that have major label support and thus are not truly indie (The Shins or Manchester Orchestra), and then you’ve got Sufjan Stevens, who is an indie artist who plays indie music.

But then again, what the hell is indie music anyhow? A particular sound defined by some elite panel of hipster judges? It’s easy to see why musicians themselves eschew genres, since a band can be defined differently depending on who you ask. Take Wilco. It can be called indie, folk, rock, country, Americana, or even pop. Are any of them entirely wrong? Are any of them entirely right?

Any of those genre adjectives could mean a number of things to different people. They’re just vines of inspiration, winding in and out of various bands down through the years, and as time goes on, they thin out. It’s incredibly rare that a new band goes so far back to the roots that it is inarguably definable – both in sound and attitude – as that core, source genre. They still exist – dyed in the wool punk and indie bands – but surely they themselves cringe when attempting to explain their place in the musical spectrum, knowing full well that their hard-earned, well-deserved adjective is nearly meaningless to anyone else. And it can never go back.

We live in a world where Avril Lavigne has been called “punk” and “indie” bands can go platinum overnight by popping up in an Apple commercial. And there’s not a goddamn thing the hardest of the hardcore or the indiest of the indie can do to change that.

Indie is the new punk. But hey, it was a fun ride while it lasted.


Want Ad: SWM Seeks Non-Existent SF

SWM seeks non-existent SF age 20 to 25 for prolonged period of sexual and emotional interdependence. Exclusivity negotiable. Must be: college educated but not a feminist or pursuing an MRS degree, uniquely and naturally pretty, fit but not muscular, fun but not embarrassingly wild, sexually experienced but not promiscuous, confident and assertive but not bitchy or demanding, and between 5’2″ and 5’8″. Major bonus points for: mixed race, creative/artistic talent, curly hair, taste for foreign films, libertarian beliefs, knee high socks, ability to beat me at a videogame, cool tattoos, preference of dogs over cats, prowess at drinking games, and love of hard rock, aggressive sports, PBR, international travel, zombie fiction, and filthy comedy. Those afflicted with daddy issues, strange fetishes or religions, annoying Yankee accents, felony records, drug habits, a distaste for sweet tea, sketchy ex-boyfriends, a love for “Sex & The City”, or a psychiatric history of instability need not apply.

Applications will be accepted in the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow just as soon as hell freezes over. Please print clearly.


You’re Doing It Wrong: “Sensitive” Songs to Not Play For Mood Music

When you and your special someone want to get down to business, it’s nice to have some background noise to set the mood – in other words, to overpower the sound of squeaky springs, thudding headboards, and the kind of animalist moans we’d never make in public.

It’s real easy to fall into the trap of playing just any old “sensitive” sounding song that you think will melt your lover’s heart, but fact is there are tons of ballads that have no place in the bedroom. In fact, these songs wouldn’t even be appropriate for a couples’ skate session:

Ben Folds Five – Brick
With vulnerable vocals and a soft, hypnotic piano melody, this sounds like the perfect song to look deep into someone’s eyes and say, “I love you so much.” Too bad the song is about a breakup over an abortion. I don’t think I really need to go any further on why this is an extremely poor choice for a bedroom fun time playlist.

The Verve Pipe – The Freshman
Same sweet, soft delivery as Brick, only this time we’re talking about an abortion, a canceled wedding, AND a death from a drug overdose. The Verve Pipe won’t be held responsible if you play this song in the sack.

Eric Clapton – Tears in Heaven
Hey, it’s a classic, it’s acoustic, and the word Heaven is in the title! How could this not be a romantic tune? Well, probably because it’s written about Clapton’s toddler falling out a 53rd story window and arguably one of the most heartbreaking songs of all time. If you don’t already know this, you probably deserve what’s coming to you. And if your significant other doesn’t seem to notice either, then you both should burn in hell for fornicating on top of Clapton’s pain. It would be like having sex at a funeral. Just, no.

Tenacious D – Fuck Her Gently
Speaking of truly stupid moves, playing anything by Tenacious D to set a sexy mood is (and I don’t care how cool your girl/guy is) an automatic fail. Playing a song called, “Fuck Her Gently” is automatic expulsion. Sure, it’s acoustic and the lyrics address an important issue – not all ladies like the hard fucking – but that’s a debate to have BEFORE stepping into the love arena for a few rounds of pelvic battle.

Brand New – Me vs. Maradona vs. Elvis
Jesse Lacey’s voice can make anything sound sexy and sensitive – including an extremely detailed confession about fucking drunk girls he doesn’t even like. He knows he’s doing something bad, but he’s just too much of a selfish jerk to care. If Tucker Max could write a minimalist rock ballad, this would be it. The only reason you would play this during sex is if you’re a sinister fuck who wants to be darkly ironic. Fittingly enough, the only way you’re gonna get away with it is if the other person is, in fact, too drunk to realize the words are about them.

Death Cab For Cutie – Someday You Will Be Loved
The key qualifier here is “someday.” Unless you plan to drop this into the playlist as a passive way of letting your special someone know that they’re just not that special to you anymore, but you wish them the best moving forward, steer clear of this track. In fact, steer clear of Death Cab in general – even remarkably romantic songs like “I Will Follow You Into The Dark” are kind of depressing.

Brian McKnight – Anytime
Go ahead. Throw this R&B piano swayer on the playlist. They’ll probably think the song is about them until they hear, “I miss you,” and realize it’s a love song to an EX. Yeah…probably not an ideal choice, UNLESS of course you do happen to be having sex with your ex, in which case this might be the most fitting song you could choose.


Movie Review: Watchmen

“Watchmen” is a big budget, superhero action epic based on a graphic novel written and drawn by Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons, respectively.

“Watchmen,” the graphic novel, is on the list of Time’s 100 Best Novels of All Time. Despite its appearance, it is NOT a comic book, it is NOT for children, and it is NOT for people who can’t understand symbolism, metaphors, or archetypes that operate on multiple levels. The same can be said for the film, as it maintains a fierce loyalty to the source material.

Say there’s a character in the film that’s a superhero. That character not only serves as a vehicle for commentary on a specific comic book superhero (or hero type) but also operates as a giant symbol for a political/ethical/philosophical mindset. For example: Dr. Manhattan – the brilliant physicist turned omnipotent force of nature in nude, blue human form – is a parallel to Superman (and possibly the Silver Surfer, but I digress…) and an icon of nuclear/total war, the importance of love to one’s humanity, and even the notion/manifested reality of God himself.

If I’ve already lost you, it’s entirely likely you will not get this film (and certainly not the brilliant graphic novel). And if you can’t get it, you will likely consider it a mediocre superhero movie with slick cinematography and an intensely erotic sex scene. So…I guess it wouldn’t be a total waste of $8 anyhow.

I make this point because, as a comic/graphic novel dork, I went into the film with every expectation of being let down. Sure, Zack Snyder managed a small miracle in “300,” but “Watchmen” is a totally different undertaking altogether.

As it turned out, the film stayed incredibly true (often word for word, shot for shot) to the graphic novel. Even the ending, which was changed, was arguably better than the original, if for no other reason than that it sincerely translated better to the film medium/audience than the original novel’s ending would have. Hint: it involves a giant squid being teleported into Times Square.

When I left the theater, I had this overwhelming sense that, from having read the graphic novel, I may have gotten more out of the film than those who hadn’t. Folks going into it expecting something like “Spiderman 3″ are surely in for a huge surprise – gory violence, tons of profanity, graphic sex, full male nudity, only one character with any “real” superpowers, and a plot far too dense to be spoon fed.

I’m painfully aware that an alarming number of moviegoers are not literate, as evidenced by how many of them constantly miss the GIGANTIC message politely asking them to turn their fucking cell phones off and shut their stupid fucking mouths. That said, I doubt YOU would be here (or at least this far down the page) if you were not literate, and since I’m sure you like seeing good movies, and since I’m sure every other person you know will see this film and talk about how goddamn epic it was, here is my friendly advice: do yourself a favor and read the graphic novel before seeing it. It only takes a few hours to read cover to cover and, even if you aren’t a comic book/graphic novel person, the writing is absolutely brilliant. If it helps, just think of it like a movie storyboard – which is funny, because that’s essentially (and thankfully) what it became.


Album Review: New Found Glory – Not Without a Fight

As I listen through New Found Glory’s latest album, “Not Without a Fight,” I can’t help but recall the famous scene from “Dazed and Confused” where Matthew McConaughey’s character, Wooderson, famously professes, “That’s what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older – they stay the same age.”

Surely the members of New Found Glory must feel like Wooderson in relation to their fans, but what I could not have predicted was feeling like Wooderson myself in relation to New Found Glory.

Yes – I just essentially called New Found Glory “jailbait.”

I first heard New Found Glory in 2000, when they were called “A New Found Glory” and more famous for an amazing album of pop-punk covers than their own songs. I was an overly self-conscious sophomore in high school, living in a boring suburban wasteland, and the Coral Springs quintet’s sugary sweet nuggets of radio-ready pseudo-punk were like sonic crack rocks for wannabe rebels like me. It was okay to like them back then, but I’m 24 now.

If New Found Glory was a musical vehicle, it would be a sketchy DeLorean whose destination date is permanently locked to “High School,” the age of sugary angst and pent up rebellion. An age I have no goddamn business going back to. And yet, I’m already halfway through the album, and haven’t skipped a track yet. Oh, god. We are far past foreplay. I’m going to hell.

It’s as if I’m 24 years old, standing outside the local bowling alley of my crap ass hometown, and along walked this naive, sexy little high school hottie called “Not Without a Fight.” And damnit, I can’t help but feel dirty for flirting with something I know I’m way too fucking old for.

I’m sure New Found Glory can relate, but hey, when your unwillingness to grow up is as much a cash cow as theirs is, you can’t necessarily blame them for continuing to crank out cute, barely legal albums like this.


  • the hive mind

  • whatchu think?

    STOP...

    View Results

    Loading ... Loading ...
  • you gotta see this

  • Link directly to us. Or write your own shit.
    iDream theme by Templates Next | Powered by WordPress