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Girl Review:

Remember when Joaquin Phoenix was an actor and not a crazed, hairy faux-recluse/rapper? He had, like, talent and stuff? I had almost forgotten the good ol’ days –oh, 2003! — until I saw Quills.

Quills is a period piece about an 18^th-century Catholic-run insane asylum, so you know that things are going to be peachy right from the start. Phoenix is the priest, handsome in his black robes and very kind in his treatment of the patients. He’s got this newfangled idea that insane people are still people, and should be treated as such. He encourages them to paint fires rather than setting them. (continue reading…)

After The Matrix came out, every movie-going mouth-breather nationwide suddenly began waxing philosophical like coffeehouse hipsters. You may remember it sounding something like this, “So if reality is just a perception, and technology was advanced enough, how would you be able to tell if your life wasn’t just a super realistic videogame you’re plugged up to?”

Minds. Were. Blown.

Meanwhile, those of us who had actually read a book in our lives, or played enough videogames to already appreciate this sort of 21^st century zen koan prior to the film… we still thought it was a hell of an action movie with a surprisingly intelligent sci-fi storyline.

The film was a box office hit and a cultural landmark. Matrix posters becoming as common a sight as MC Escher and Salvador Dali on co-ed walls.

For the purposes of this review, and to forgive great directors their latter day sins, we’ll refrain from discussing the sequels.

Fast-forward roughly 10 years and Christopher Nolan – Mr. Dark Knight himself – goes and does the impossible. He out-Matrix’s the Matrix. How?

He writes and directs Inception, a film where he essentially puts the Matrix…get this…IN THE MATRIX.

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Hello, my name is Michael, and I love movies.

I managed a video store for three years. I hold a degree in Film Studies.  I’m a(n) accomplished screenwriter.  I’m even employed by Warner Brothers (though they’re more concerned with my ability to stuff paychecks into envelopes than my ideas).

However, despite all this, there’s still an ungodly amount of fantastic cinema that I have yet to experience.  Back in the day, when I was stocking shelves and chatting up customers at Vision Video, I frequently heard the phrase:

“What do you mean you haven’t seen that!? You work at a video store!”

Yeah, I know.  Trust me, I wish I could take back the time I spent watching Date Movie and put that hour and a half towards something riveting and awe-inspiring. Like this classic gem of a film.

Therefore, in honor of all the epic and glorious films I’ve missed, here’s a list of the Top 10 Movies of All Time That I Haven’t Taken The Time Or Made An Effort To See… Yet. I will list them in descending order, and provide a brief review on what I can only assume the damn thing is about.

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The Missouri Breaks

Released in 1976 and set in late 19^th century Montana, The Missouri Breaks was directed by New Hollywood’s most underappreciated director, Arthur Penn.  Penn gave the film a tremendous look and feel, but the reason to queue this particular Revisionist Western is its 3 great performances:

Jack Nicholson plays the leader of a gang of rustlers.  He poses as a small-time farmer in order to get revenge on the wealthy rancher that killed his friend.  Nicholson has all the fire and wild-eyed unpredictability that you would expect (see: Five Easy Pieces, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest) and creates a Western anti-hero who is unsympathetic, unethical, and overwhelmed.

Marlon Brando plays Robert E. Lee Clayton, an eccentric (read: Fabulous!) regulator who uses unconventional style and brutal justice to deal with Nicholson and his gang.  If Brando was trying to make this character as anti-Western as possible he succeeded.  This is one of Brando’s last half-sane performances and despite the fact that he refused to be directed, read his lines off of cue cards, and invented a character that seems unreal, Robert E. Lee Clayton is captivating and the Brando’s erratic performance really works.

Harry Dean Stanton plays Cal, Nicholson’s closest friend.  Harry Dean Stanton is hands down the best supporting actor a film could ever ask for and this movie is a great display of his scene stealing presence. Check his Wikipedia page and you will find this quote from Roger Ebert: “No movie featuring either Harry Dean Stanton or M. Emmet Walsh in a supporting role can be altogether bad.”  I would add my own quote: “A better than average Western starring two eccentrics can gain a great deal of authenticity and stability from a Harry Dean Stanton performance.”

And, you’ll notice a young Randy Quaid in a supporting role. (continue reading…)

“Watchmen” is a big budget, superhero action epic based on a graphic novel written and drawn by Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons, respectively.

“Watchmen,” the graphic novel, is on the list of Time’s 100 Best Novels of All Time. Despite its appearance, it is NOT a comic book, it is NOT for children, and it is NOT for people who can’t understand symbolism, metaphors, or archetypes that operate on multiple levels. The same can be said for the film, as it maintains a fierce loyalty to the source material.

Say there’s a character in the film that’s a superhero. That character not only serves as a vehicle for commentary on a specific comic book superhero (or hero type) but also operates as a giant symbol for a political/ethical/philosophical mindset. For example: Dr. Manhattan – the brilliant physicist turned omnipotent force of nature in nude, blue human form – is a parallel to Superman (and possibly the Silver Surfer, but I digress…) and an icon of nuclear/total war, the importance of love to one’s humanity, and even the notion/manifested reality of God himself.